by Anthony Aguinaldo
he, him, his
As someone who began working as a hospital chaplain in the middle of a global pandemic, I thought I could do anything. I had been present with people during some very difficult times and sat with loved ones as they dealt with grief and loss. Because I’d been interning there for over a year before I was hired, the hospital had become a setting I was comfortable in –I believed it was time to challenge myself. As of this writing I am in pursuit of becoming a board-certified chaplain, and wanting to have diverse and challenging experiences for my professional development is the reason why I came to Taller de José (TDJ). I would slowly realize that helping people find peace as they face death is a walk in the park compared to accompanying people as they face systems that are stifling at best and death-dealing at their worst.
I came to realize how challenging the work at TDJ can be when I was helping a service participant who was experiencing homelessness, who did not know why they stopped getting their Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefits, and who had a slew of other needs connected to these two presenting issues. They faced so many barriers and did not have access to many resources –not having any valid form of identification made everything even more difficult. The more I listened and met with the client, the more I could feel the crushing weight of the systems holding them down.
I could feel the client’s hopelessness, and their hopelessness became mine.
The thing that I thought the service participant needed also became what I needed: to know that they aren’t alone, that there’s help, and that you can ask for help.
When I opened up to peers about how I was feeling, they validated my experience: this work is hard. In the same way, I was able to validate the service participant about their challenges. By opening up and asking questions to the TDJ staff, I was able to try different things to help. The more things I tried, the more I was able to demonstrate to the participant that there is always help if we just know where to look, and the more I asked for help at various organizations and institutions, the more direction I was able to receive to better help the service participant.
With each dead-end we reached, we were able to get much closer to finding the right path. Because we continued trying, because we were resilient and patient, we would eventually get much closer to finding the illuminated path.
I recently rediscovered the song You Gotta Be by Des’Ree, and through these words I was able to find comfort and motivation to keep trying. The service participant and I are now both hopeful that before the end of my internship at TDJ, he will regain access to his benefits. Perhaps this oversimplifies the work at TDJ, and I should have talked about all the hours of research, emails, and phone calls I made for this particular case, but I believe the most important thing I can tell you about this work is that you gotta be…
You Gotta Be by Des’Ree
Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead, release your fears
Stand up and be counted
Don’t be ashamed to cry
You gotta be
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Herald what your mother said
Read the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view
My oh my, eh, eh, eh
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Got to be bold
Got to be bad
Got to be wise
Do what others say
Go to be hard
Not too too hard
All I know is love will save the day
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
